Once upon a time on a dig in Egypt...
A few years ago I was in Egypt, on a dig site, not far from the banks of the Nile but out of the way of the Pyramids and Statues you'd associate with the usual "big finds" of the late 19th/early 20th century.
We were looking for a tomb, a new paper had raised interesting questions about a possible disgraced Pharaoh who had been mummified, and buried against the customs of the time. If any of this sounds off I'm no Egyptologist, my mate Dave had invited me along as the crew was small and needed all the help they could get, even from an amateur like me, and I've never been one to say no to a free holiday, and I've got to say, it was pretty sweet.
So there we were, my mate Dave (a long suffering Phd student), Ginge (who was struggling in the heat), Tommo (who took everything in his stride), and the Professor, a grumpy, old, and somewhat rotund man who was particularly disappointed with the turnout of his dig that he kept telling us "would make his career" - of course we were more concerned with getting this dig over with so we could escape the bugs and sand and get into El Gouna to get our drink on.
After a week or so of back breaking labour, tedious dig marking, and brushing down three dozen rocks in case they were "treasures from another age" we found a tablet... stone obviously, not like an iPad. It read 'Whom so ever should seek the cursed one should know that they too shall be cursed for uncovering the tomb" - or something like that! Of course everyone but the professor, who knew he had made his career, and Tommo, who took the chance to do a little sunbathing while the deciphering took place, were worried. A mummies curse seems like fiction, but given the atmosphere (and the mild sunstroke) anything seemed possible.
As we continued to dig over the next few days it became apparent we were getting close, as large chunks of kilned sand, once brick, began to appear, and soon we found the entrance to the tomb.
We went through the first chamber, torches in hand, and set up lanterns to explore the area. We found that inside was a spiderweb of tunnels, filled with Egyptian relics and treasures. Not only were we to be famous, but also rich. The professor spent all hours in the tomb, cataloguing and writing notes furiously with an unending supply of pencils which he wore down to useless stumps with his constant drawing and writing. The noise was unbearable, scratch scratch scratch against the thick, rough paper.
After more than a week of exploring we finally got to the bottom of the hieroglyphs, and the professor proudly exclaimed he'd found the secret to the tomb, each of us would have to take a "puzzle wall" as he called it, and complete them in close enough of a time to unlock the centre chamber.
My wall was simple, just replace sections of broken wall onto the awaiting surface, I put everything in and held the last piece, awaiting the time to add it in. I studied the hands of my wrist watch intently, tick tick tick, and then, on the hour, I placed the piece in, and there was a thud.
We regrouped near the entrance and found that the floor had given way to stairs, remembering the warning of a curse, we tiptoed down the stairs, vigilant for any sign of danger.
step. step. step.
we got to the bottom of the staircase, and looked around, once the lanterns were all set up we could see, in the pillar in the centre of the room, a sarcophagus was built into a small recess. We uncovered it fully, and swept off the dust "The creature in this tomb has been buried with earthly delights, so that he might give into his avarice and greed, he can never enter the afterlife while these wants keep him here" We all looked at each other and Ginge ran for it, straight back up the stairs.
Tommo took out a wrecking bar, and between us we managed to open the tomb. As we shone our torches we saw a mummy, covered in chocolate and nuts.
The professor took in a sharp breath, "my god" he said with awe "I don't believe it, this tomb, the one we're standing in right now... it's the burial ground of Pharaoh Roche".
