Jokes other sites are gonna copy and paste off here!

[BC]

Times are hard for people on disability benefits. I've got a friend who's a dwarf, and he's struggling to put food on the table.

 

[markfinn]

 

[markfinn]

 

[markfinn]

 

[markfinn]

What are the three shortest words in the English language?
“Is it in?”

 

[markfinn]

What does a sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
Beat it, we’re closed.

 

[BC]

As a kid, I was made to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog.

 

[BC]

Borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect it back.

 

[BC]

There are three kinds of mathematicians. Those who can count and those who can't.

 

[davejb]

For sale:
Half a cat
Apply E Schrodinger

 

[BC]

What do you call two men hanging from a window? Kurt 'n' Rod.

 

[BC]

I once loved two girls at a time.

Kate and Edith both were mine.

I learned that what they say is true.

You can't have your Kate and Edith too.